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| credit to: Aiman Azlan |
I don't believe in "dominant in marriage"
Neither the husband, nor the wife
Dominance is something powerful. Someone dominant should be someone approaching perfections that they need no companions, assistant to come into conclusions or decisions.
Their word is nothing but a command
They listen to opinion but their decision is indisputable
That's how dominant person act
Dominant is a boss-nature
I don't really comfortable when elderly humorously mentioning in certain occasions
"Ask the boss"
"Depend on the boss"
Which referring to the father's/husband's authority to decide something
I acknowledge father's or husband's wise decisions
But rather than calling him boss, we better address him as a leader
For me, when u call someone is boss, he has the right to be dominant.
Boss is someone who has employees under their surveillance
But the term works within an organisation not applicable in family or marriage
Wife and kids are not employees, they are families who living under father's wings
Whom father should lead, protect and inspired
Father or husband should lead by example, not giving command and refuse excuses.
It is an authoritarianism!
But I believe in leadership
Husband and wife, both working together to build a blissful and successful marriage.
A successful marriage is not something born naturally. It takes efforts from both party.
A husband as a leader and the wife is the co-leader
A book that I read says that a marriage is like riding a car
There is a driver, co driver and the passenger
The passenger is the off spring
The passenger literally follow to where the car is heading.
The husband should act a leader. But is the leader is always right and fine all the time?
No. The husband might did mistakes several times.
The wife supposed to correct the husband
The husband might need helps sometimes
There is the wife who will lend her hand
The husband might dwell, unable to move at certain conditions
There got the wife who raise them mentally, emotionally
Father or husband communicate with wife and children with manner, respect, consideration and tolerance
This is because he is the leader
He brings everyone to a new house but it's the wife or mother who make it a home
He provide necessities and buy the groceries but the wife is the one prepare the mouth watering dishes
He brings family to a vacation but the children makes the trips much more meaningful
The concept of living under one roof isn't well practiced if the father act like a boss who disregard his family member's emotion and mind state
A father or husband is respected not because he's the one who provide us everything, not because of the religion obligation either
but being a father or husband itself is an honour
The willingness to hold new responsibilities is something valuable and dictate how courageous they are.
The father or husband is not lowering his title as a leader if he listening and considering the family member's opinion and emotion.
He still earns respect by everyone eventhough he acts considerate towards family members
It's not that the father cannot be strict and poorly making desicion as well.
'Strict' is a must to mold the behaviour of wife or children
'Considering' is something else
After all, father or husband is the one whom family members respect and rely on for everything.
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