Feeble

There is always a day when I feel kinda dysfunction, passive and not doing well

I'm neither proactive nor productive

Sometimes, I go thru some bad days
A lot of issues but need to be done in short period of times

But
Life is like that

I remember, those days when I need to settle something real quick
The time was chasing and I felt the pressure on my head
I even overwork extra 2 or 3 hours for several days in a row
That had given me fatigue

And one day, I need to take care of a case and it's so hard to find the solution
My laptop getting lagged most of the time and my internet connection suddenly spurned all of sudden

I was an inch to cry myself but slowly pull myself together and did my task accordingly

And at the end of day, I eventually settled everything and even contributed something to my team

I felt so contented and my heart felt light as feather
Just 30 minutes before, I was about to cry a river but suddenly I was completely oookay

Indeed, I'm feeble if Allah left me alone
But Allah is actually giving me a test for me to do better in my responsibly

Everyday I wake up with a sense to do better and improve myself
But the things that hold me is nothing but
less faith and discourage

I want do better but sometimes I just feel like doing the same things

I want to explore more but I refuse to sacrifice times and effort

But there's always a day when I just take it and do it
Whatever comes afterwards is a risk

But in every risk,
there's always an adventurous and challenged that will shape what kind of person I am then after🌙