Relationship

Case I

So I know a girl who has a boyfriend.

They have been in a relationship and she planned to get married with him.

It's good cause it will make her life better cause she always wanted to get married.
Although she's not seems desperate talking about marriage like all the time but she once said that this is probably the right time for her to end her solo life in her current age.

She rarely told about her bf but last week,

she seems sooo stress n been soooo anxious like butterfly in stomach n all.

But...long story short, she suspected her bf having another girl.

At LinkedIn !

Personally, I was sooo distracted like, the heck he's flirting via LinkedIn lol..😂 everyone knows, that is a place to find career not soulmate and all aigooooooo.

But things get real when it busted and my friend is investigating the root cause right now n she's completely full of anger,at the moment.

Been cursing out of anger and  dissapointed feelings she's having towards her bf, she utterly said that she is super frustrated cause she's been imagining getting married with him and not interested in playful relationship anymore.its tiring.

Case II

The other case is about someone that I used to know, who is going for dates with her bf like, every weekend!

Going everywhere together, short vacay and all.

She's even become extra caring towards him as if they're married couple. Ohh please!

 

Well,also her.....getting frustrated when her bf said something that hurts her feelings like, very deep one u know.

Seriously, why that guy still hang out with her but didn't have intentions to get married with her!

 

Sooo

yaaa.

 

I was thinking...

 

What-kind-of-relationship-is-that?

 

Ok, it might seems judgemental, but gaisss, seriously, just stop all this shitty relationship if u have one.

Getting date, facetime, phone call, watching movies, texting, fancy gift n present, doing things like a married couple did?

 

*sigh

 

Okay.

 

 

Girl.

 

Listen,

 

I'm about to tell u several things that u need to think twice and apply it.

 

 

• Don't be someone's wife before you are OFFICIALLY someone's wife.

Be expensive, put your dignity at the highest place as it is the most  precious things in our life as a woman.

Why you always hang out with a guy who has no relationship with you, there's no point u're doing that. Wasting time,feeling and energy.

That's all nafs and short term happiness,girl.

The worst things is, he is not even plan to get married with u but decided to merely spend time with you.

Hey girls, I tell u, please,

Do find a MAN!

Not an immature BOY!

Come on. You are precious than u think, girl. Your time, your tears, all that, deserve going to the right place.

 

And also,

Do u think Allah will  redha with that kind of relationship?

You remember someone more than you remember Him. You spend your quality time more than you should have given to please Allah in your solah. If Allah is far from us, what's point of life.😢

Then, when you get dump, u will innocently asking "what have I done that Allah had punished me this way"

Well, think again, maybe u are the one who neglecting Him first. U put a guy as your priority,  not Allah, so maybe Allah just test u a little bit.embrace it and put Allah as a priority, don't waste your time to a playful relationship.

 

 

• We no need people to decide happiness in our life.

Don't put your happiness on people's perception and the way they treat you.

We don't need man to fulfill our need.

 

 

• Don't get married just to end your solo life. 

If u found out something fishy n a lot of suspicious things about your partner, why proceed? Stop it. It will be even worse after getting married.

 

 

• Please girl, don't chase after a man.

A good man will come at the right n perfect time. Have an effort, find that right guy in a right way, don't give up.

 

 

•  And one important things to do at the first place. Remember your intention of getting married.

 

Get married so u become a better mu'min, a better muslim.

Find a man who can guide you,

the one you trust,

the one who has effort to marry you,

the one who has effort to improve his life,

the one who has effort to seeks knowledge in Islam, not suppose to be an 'Ustaz' but at least,

the one who has a better knowledge in deen than you,

the one who has a clear understanding in Islam, not a 'celaru' one.

the one u can respect,

If u are simply cursing at your partner before married, it clearly, shows that u can't even respect your partner.

He don't earn your respect,

Someone that going to be a leader in a family should be someone who you feel confident to rely on, to lead your family.

Not someone who you can't respect.

the one u can rely on to teach your kids about how a baitul muslim lifestyle should be,

the one who can build a family following what RasulAllah had taught us in his sunnah,

the one who can brings you closer to Allah.

Having a spouse who can brings u to Jannah.

I know people might said

"there are a lot more ways for a woman to enter jannah,not necessary depend on husband"

but well, why u getting married if u don't want to reach to Jannah together 🙆😇.

 

 

• Be a better version of yourself,

Correct the way you perform solah.

Ustaz Ebit Lew once said "if u correct your solah, you are correcting your whole life"

 

Pray 5 times a day is compulsory.

Add extra points, pray earlier in time, practice a lot more sunnat prayer. Do a lot more. Come on.

Let Allah see you.

Let Allah acknowledge your effort.

Do something that He likes.

That is first things to do.

You will definitely find the true happiness, trust me.

 

 

• Don't postpone your hijrah.

If you want to do, u really need to do it right now! Not tomorrow, not after married. Do it now!

Remember.

Spouse is like a mirror.

You will getting someone who is exactly like YOU.

 

You want to do bad things?

Proceed, if you want a life partner who is having bad habit like u.

Doing 'maksiat mata',  'maksiat telinga', 'maksiat hati'?

Neglecting about ikhtilat (pakai sebat, bertepuk tampar lelaki perempuan)?

Cursing?

Lying?

Don't cover your modesty?

Don't worry,  u will get the same.

Because Allah already stated in Al Quran, 

"a good girl, for a good guy " and vice versa.

Just,

Turn to Allah.

Allah has the answer and He will answer us.

Allah will give the best to us.

People will come and go. Just the best, will stay.

Stay calm and don't forget your Du'a.